Fairchilde has left me - I am sad and alone without her.
My life will never be the same. She has shown me worlds I never new existed, nor she knew existed.
I thought thoughts that I did not know I had.
She is the center.
Now the Lady has left, with only the aluminum triplex to travel with. I am sad. Somehow she must bring her ship back - but it is not possible. I will be alone soon, and in need of her company.
When the owls begin to cry, and the clouds roll and fall. . .
The garden won't grow because the rain doesn't fall here. I suspect it's because Lady Elaine parked her space ship above. I've asked her to move it, but she refuses. She says she still has big projects here.
Early one morning I filled my belly with Hurry-Up-Syrup, too much I think. I fell into a deep sleep.
I dreamt many things: The arrow showed me to the box under the bed that held the blue key, a key to her room. I used it, and the door opened. And when I awoke I could finally see the yellow flowers in the ditch.
The curse continues. I watch her tonite alone in a dark room I am obsessed and clearly possessed. I actually can not stop thinking about her. The television is off. The room is dark. I am here with her in my mind together at last. I can smell her later. Why is this the case? She is hidden under the kitchen floor for the future. And I cannot stop eating and spitting it back out.
My stars are out tonight. And when they are, I can't sleep. To the table I go - pour the coffee & cream, and stare.
I can't help think the lady is a part of my mind now. She is the fear born from my youth, and made alive on the television. When it was turned off I could look deep into the cyrstals on the ceiling and create her in my minds eye - breathing life into her. It can still happen.
When the musk fills your nose, and the cancer grows, you know it's time to move from your home, because the Lady has moved in. Stay, and she will consume you.
It was dusk. I was a boy again. I was alone amongst the wet trees. Ahead, I could see it hanging from a branch, swinging slowly back and forth, creaking. It was dead - by its own hand, of stick fingers. I tried to help, but nothing could help it. The arrow was there. LEF was there. I am sorry, I honestly could not do anything.
So, last night I finally had the experience I have been waiting for: I gathered up all my childhood paintings of her, and a yellow, plastic coat hanger. I hung them on the wall and called for her. She arrived. The room hummed. My paintings fluttered in her prescence. We are on better terms. It's sad to think my aunt is possessed; but the coffee stains on the table resemble her everyday.
The common toothbrush - a part of our daily lives, an intimate tool for our bodies. And when people are welcomed into our home, it is seen and thought about. No matter where I hide it, she finds it, and takes it.
This window fills me with a pleasant melancholy for her of course, and for Caroline sometimes. And other things.
It was 3 A.M. eternal -------> The dim light from the window being so ghostly in the air. I could see so much more --------> so many things. My mind was inverted, and I understood more than ever. The concept of Her blossomed in my head -----> ideas became pictures ------> emotion turned into an image of how We knew each other before . . . before We physically met. Written words from the past, dreams of the present worked together, as I looked through the window. The window into Us. The words finally came to my lips.
SHE heard them. SHE held me tenderly through the exploration, with questions, sensitivity, and touch.
And in the end, I miss the Being that is my transcendental Daughter and Friend. And with that the tears came.
Yet, I just cannot understand it all, so much still unknown. I am full and pleased.
Somehow she manages to be present in all the rooms at once, and even talks to me through the ceiling fan. Giving it some thought, I believe all arrows point to my fairest of ladies. That is why the electric bill has been climbing rather high lately.
In a deep-thought trance of Her It became apparent that She and I are possibly of the same mold Perhaps just two different forms of the same, in thought, perception, organization The secrets She keeps stashed, I too keep, in fun and in fear If exposed, hot stress boils into a need for control and centering By cutting off clean the cause of it all Though we've come so far to be here It makes no difference to me at this second My rejection of You is now - the arrow calls
Surely You remember how it felt to reject me You saw no other way out Life heaped up on You, and You looked for the arrow You found it ---hacked----> and I fell deep into tears
And now the arrow calls me It reveals the truth of Her and I, of our nature That being, emotion before efficiency, is wrong And in a second, one would spit the other out But now inside I am calmed and understood by her, Her, and HER She and I were rare, and are to this day The chances of our first meeting, extrodinary This is right
Now, I'm not sure if this is true or not, but I just heard Lady Elaine Fairchilde is coming to the big screen, played by, of course, Grayson Hall. Maybe it will just be playing on the big screen of our dreamless sleep.
Just when you thought you understood yourself and your life.
You turn around to see a picture of a decade past.
And you change - your life changes.
And you hope the change never ends.
Friday, March 06, 2009
Finally completed my Frank's Box. It's true, it really does attract the shadow beings. But, I really can't wait until I hear Lady Elaine's voice break through the fuzz & static.
Some believe warts are the point at which other-dimensional beings (like Lady Elaine) have made contact with our bodies. This causes the skin to rupture and the wart virus creeps inside.
Believe or not, the well known Communist Country has banned the "Mister Rogers" television program. The Entertainment Minister announced just last week that the show would be cut. It was brought to his attention after reports of hundreds of frightened children. Apparently so many kids screamed in horror upon seeing Lady Elaine, that they're pulling the plug on the whole show.